What to do T__T

I feel so stupid. stupid. and stupid.
Just because seeing something from him, I got all emo again..
Really, it's very annoying..After an oath I made for myself and all..Now I know that my heart really can't lie..Oath I made is that I'll let everything flows..I won't try to forget him..That really tortures me..Because every time I give it my all to forget, the more I think of him unconsciously..How many times a day that I think about him?twice?thrice?maybe more..
So, rather than torturing myself everyday, it's better to let it be..Because a best medicine to a broken heart is to fall in love..But I've tried and it's not that easy to just fall with someone.. 

But now??Look at me..so pathetic. Just seeing it..already made me so hurt..The world is unfair isn't it?While he could pass everyday without thinking of me as if I never existed, but me?I wonder what's wrong with me..or maybe what's my mistake..Is this a punishment for something I did wrong in the past?
The more I think about it, the more I don't get the answer..Just let it hurt..I don't care anymore..I don't know what to do..
I can only keep my faith..maybe one day everything would be better, much much better.. 
I hope these stupid tears could stop soon..I'm just tired to let the tears come out for someone who isn't even think of me..


Whatever. Let it be. Let it hurt. Let it broken.